I'm officially confusing the hell out of my body. I wonder if it will ever go back to normal. I started taking Estradiol and Androgel on Wednesday. I've taken Estradiol before, 4 mg. a day. Now, I'm only taking 2 mg. so I'm not freaking out about that one. But, I'm really unsure about this testosterone gel business.
First of all, insurance won't cover it since it's infertility related. The gel cost about $299 out-of-pocket. Luckily, I got a discount since we are self-pay. It would have been more than $400. But, then, I found out that I will eventually switch to a testosterone patch. That costs about $50 (with discount). So, with the cost of these hormones and paying for our consultation with the RE on Tuesday, we just threw down roughly $600 in three days! $600 to get prepared for a cycle that we may not even be able to start cause my cysts could still be there. My thoughts were all over the place on Wednesday. I spent the day contemplating doing nothing this month just so that we didn't waste money or meds. But, the devil on my shoulder kept reminding me that the cysts may be gone at the end of this cycle. If so, we can get to our final egg retrieval much sooner. Luckily, there will be PLENTY of testosterone gel left in case we have to take a break and try this again in a few months.
Anyways, I spent 90 minutes driving to the pharmacy and back on Wednesday night. I got home just in time to give myself a testosterone rub. Time is of the essence in this infertility business. They really want you doing everything at the exact same time each day. For this protocol, I've been given times for certain drugs. The gel is measured by pumps. Each pump (or actuation) is 1.25 grams. That's the exact amount I'm supposed to apply to my shoulder/upper arm each night at 9 PM. So, I put one pump in my palm and rub my shoulder/arm. Then, I have to let it dry completely being careful not to let it rub against my husband or dog. Once dry, I have to put a shirt on over it to keep others from being able to rub against it. I didn't think about the whole shower thing with my first rub so I ended up waiting til midnight to shower on Wednesday. The directions say to wait more than 2 hours to shower. So, that was fun! I feel like I should be lifting weights while I'm giving myself rubs. I'll give my husband some competition. If I can't have babies, at least I can have one fit bod! ;)
Take a look at the directions for this stuff. It was a tiny little square in the box that took about 5 minutes to unfold. In my husband's words, "Damn! It looks like someone wrote a novel on that thing!"
Leading Up to My Next Cycle
Here's my protocol leading up to my baseline ultrasound, which will surely show that I still have cysts. (That's my prediction. The cysts will be there and we'll end up waiting another month or two).
July 13- Started 2mg. Estradiol, and one pump of testosterone gel.
Start baby Aspirin, continue CoQ10, quit taking DHEA
July 26- Start Prometrium (inserted vaginally each AM and PM!! Seriously?!?!)
July 30- Stop Testosterone gel
July 31- Start Testosterone Patch (wear 9PM- 9AM) each day
August 4- Take last dose of Prometrium, Estradiol, and Testosterone
Then, we wait for my period to start so we can do our Baseline. Cross your fingers that, by some sort of miracle, the cysts are GONE! Inserting capsules into my vagina needs to be worth it.
Cyst Update
It may all be in my head but, now that I know they're there, I can feel them. It only bothers me when I'm laying on my left side, which is how I sleep. It just feels like pressure in my ovarian region and is pretty uncomfortable. I'm also peeing a lot more... and it gets pretty painful when I need to make a bowel movement. (HAHA! I have very little reserve on my bodily functions these days). I checked with the nurse to see if I could exercise. It would only make sense that if I can't exercise with 9-10 21mm follicles, that I probably shouldn't exercise with 5 four cm. cysts, right?? Wrong! She said not to do any ab workouts or yoga but that running and cardio should be fine. So, I did the elliptical yesterday thinking that would be a little less bouncy than running. Afterwards, I felt a few sharp pains. Maybe I should hold off on anything other than walking. I'd hate to lose an ovary to cysts and be out of the game for good. *sigh* This really is the pits.
Getting On With Life
I chose to stay busy this summer so as not to wallow in self-pity all day everyday. Luckily, I got to hang with the coolest baby in the world yesterday. Normally, being around babies would kill me. But, this particular baby happens to be the result of a successful IVF and I absolutely adore him. My best friend struggled with infertility for 3 years and got pregnant the first time they tried IVF. I have loved this little guy since he was a growing embryo in the lab.
He got sick on Wednesday and couldn't return to daycare for 24 hours so I got to be Auntie/Nanny for the day! It really made me miss being a nanny. Taking care of babies is totally my jam. We had a blast! The best part was seeing my dog's reaction to him. She was so gentle and tried playing with him. They accidentally played fetch for a while. My dog knew what was going on but Little Dude was just laughing at her and throwing toys. It was precious! Needless to say, yesterday flew by and confirmed that I will have a baby in my life one day, no matter what it takes. It was also nice to see how well the pups adjusted to having a baby around. Good to know.
Today, I'm planning all the adventures for vacation next week. It's the last week of summer for me and we'll be taking a much needed vacay. I can't wait to get away and get my mind off things. My poor husband needs a break too. Work is killing him. He literally works more than 12 hours a day and wakes up to work e-mails on the weekends. He was up til 2 AM on Wednesday prepping for a presentation he had to give for grad school. I seriously don't know how he functions with everything going on. His stress level must be insane!
I'm curious to see the reaction I get when I have to pull testosterone gel out of my bag during the security check at the airport. Hopefully they won't give me a hard time about exceeding the liquid limit for carry-ons.
Cheers to vacation and testosterone rubs!
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| Trying to play fetch with the baby. She held that toy in her mouth for at least 10 minutes waiting for him to take it and throw it. |
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