For 3 months, we continued trying naturally. Timed intercourse with positive ovulation using Pre-Seed and putting my feet in the air afterwards (with a pillow under my butt to raise the hips). At this point, it was so routine I forgot how weird that was. No alcohol during the tww (two week wait) and very little exercise.
I began eating much healthier and slowed down with the coffee. Being a 3rd grade teacher during the holidays isn't easy. So, the healthy eating slowly mixed in with unhealthy habits and the coffee made it's way back into my life. Trust me, I needed it with 22 rambunctious children running around the room waiting for a break from school, Santa, trips out of town, candy, class parties, etc. YEESH! For Christmas, I received over $150 in Starbucks gift cards. That's how serious my coffee drinking had become. EVERYONE KNEW IT!
The end of our 3-months of hopeful trying happened to be a couple of days before Christmas when we were gearing up for a road trip halfway across the country. It shook me up really bad! I felt like screaming, crying, punching everything in sight. I just wanted to give up. How was it even possible that I still wasn't pregnant?!? I've done everything right. My cycles are perfect. I ovulate every month. My husband had his sperm analysis done and the whole office was bragging about his numbers. I had tried weird diets, given up alcohol and caffeine (at times). I held my feet up after intercourse and EVEN went to sleep afterwards on occasion. There was no reason for us not to be pregnant! But, I had to move forward.
We decided to drive to the in-laws so that we could take our dog with us. There's no way I'm taking my poor puppy on a plane and forcing her to stay in a crate through all the travel. Also, I've become quite attached to this dog. We got her shortly after we began trying. My husband wanted a dog more than anything and I kept fighting it. He basically forced this to happen and I'm so happy he did. She's definitely been a positive in my life. People may think I'm obsessed but I think it's okay to fall in love with a devoted animal that loves me unconditionally. :) She makes me laugh and gives me a reason to get up and moving everyday. She lets me squeeze her when I cry or licks the tears off my face. It's a win-win situation.
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| Our puppy on Christmas |
While visiting the in-laws, I obsessively googled reasons that one may not be able to get pregnant. As fate would have it, a girl I knew from middle school posted her pregnancy announcement on Facebook stating that it had taken years for them to finally get there. I decided to message her to see what she meant by that. Lucky for me, she was more than willing to share her story and help out. They were able to get pregnant with IVF and learned that her thyroid was the main issue. I searched relentlessly for thyroid problems and began diagnosing myself. Her messages were so encouraging and helpful, it brought me to tears. I messaged my best friends about this (in our ongoing group text), and my fellow infertile friend suggested I see her Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE). Trust me, this was not the first time she had suggested this. I kept blowing it off thinking that nothing was wrong and I'd eventually get pregnant. I'm not sure why I actually listened this time, but I did.
On the way home from our trip to the in-laws, I shared everything with my husband. He was very supportive. We called and made our first appointment with an RE right there in the car. That's the first time I actually felt like this was an official thing, me being infertile. It felt real and hurt like hell. But, we were seeing a specialist and I just knew that they'd be able to help...
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