I'm Still Here, With a Toddler!

I'm still here! And I am so angry at myself for not keeping up with the blog as I'd hoped to. There have been so many exciting milestones and adventures since my last post (6 months ago). Starting today, I hope to get back into the groove of writing on here. So let's do some catching up.

Merbaby is no longer a baby. He is a full-on walking, climbing, boundary-testing toddler! He will be 14 months old next week. At his 12-month appointment he weighed 21 lbs. and was 29 inches long. We have gotten rid of the infant car seat and moved to the convertible carseats. Those aren't quite as easy to switch in and out when the grandparents are keeping him but we manage it. He's down to only one nap a day. He isn't drinking from bottles at all anymore. We're still breastfeeding in the morning and at bedtime. Otherwise, he gets water and/or pea milk from a sippy cup. He eats 3 meals and 3 snacks a day. And sometimes that isn't even enough. (A growing boy loves to eat). He absolutely loves looking at books and pointing out pictures. He likes stacking things up and knocking them down. He also really enjoys pulling everything out of a certain container and moving it to another container. Balloons, bubbles, and balls send him into a fit of excited squeals. He is just soaking up every bit of knowledge he can and it is so fun to watch.

checking out his first birthday present from the grandparents

Walking Adventures
He took his first steps in June while at Little Gym. We were attending a make-up class on a Saturday morning, which meant that Mr. Merman got to join us. It happened out of no where! We were on the gym mat getting ready for bubble time and he just took 3 steps toward me. Mr. Merman and I both froze in shock, jaws dropped, eyes filling with tears. Then we exploded in celebration and started telling everyone around us what just happened. We probably looked deliriously insane but it was beyond exciting! It didn't take long for him to catch on and become more comfortable with walking. There were definitely lots of falls, bruises, and frustrations but he just got stronger and stronger each day. At this point, he's practically running everywhere he goes and looks like a little man.

Check Out That Grill
The past week has been pretty chaotic. It began with a low grade fever last Sunday that quickly shot up to 102.3. A visit to the pediatrician resulted in an ear infection diagnosis, one prescription for amoxicillin, and permission to return to school the following day. Tuesday afternoon, I received a call from daycare informing me that Merbaby had a rash that was spreading from his torso to his face and the fever was back. Upon picking him up, I learned that this rash had spread from the infant room and every almost every kid in his class was now suffering from it. The doctors were claiming that it was viral and there was nothing to do but treat the fever and wait. So I stayed home with him on Wednesday and Merman stayed home with him on Thursday.

Wednesday was such a sweet day. The poor baby took 2 naps and wanted to snuggle with me all day. During a diaper change, I noticed a tooth cutting through his bottom gum. The next day, Mr. Merman texted because two more teeth were cutting through! And by Friday morning, his gums were bleeding from all of these new developments. My poor baby!! Ear infection, fever, viral rash, two canines, and a new molar all in one week?!?! No wonder he was so pitiful and hadn't been sleeping well. The poor little guy was in so much pain.

two new canines and a molar

His low grade temp. and rash stuck around until Sunday afternoon. Yesterday was the first day he seemed to be 100% back to normal. But we're keeping an eye on those gums because it seems as though another molar is making it's way in.

Summer With My Guy
Can I just say that Summer 2018 will forever be the BEST SUMMER OF MY LIFE? Not working and spending every day with Merbaby was a dream come true. Being his mom is the absolute best thing in the world! I have never felt as happy as I did during those months. My only rules were as follows: Stay busy with enriching activities, stick to a schedule, and get out of the house at least once a day.

We signed up for swim lessons, Music Class, Little Gym, and got a membership to the zoo. Swim lessons were awesome for him! We weren't fans of how the facility was run and will not be taking him back there. But it was a very beneficial experience for him. He loves being in the water and splashing. Often, he tries to swim right out of our arms because he just wants to do it on his own. Dunking him under the water turned out to be no big deal. He does it with ease and never swallows any water. Sitting on the side of the pool and "jumping" or sliding off into our arms (while we sing "Humpty Dumpty") was his favorite activity. The smiles and giggles just melt my heart.

We attended Music Class on Fridays and Little Gym on Mondays. Whenever we got the chance, we attended story time at the library. Music Class proved to be very beneficial because I could turn the music on when he was upset and the tears instantly stopped. We have had several living room and kitchen dance parties to the Panda Collection. It took him a while to open up, interact, and play with the instruments but by the end of the summer, he was running around with the other kids and trying to play all the instruments at once.
Little Gym was was so great for his physical development. In just two short months, he started walking and climbing. He was able to hang onto the uneven bars and rings all by himself for about 5 seconds. He began crawling through things and underneath things without hesitation. And he became really comfortable with walking on the balance beam (with support). I really wish I didn't have to work full time so that we could continue attending Little Gym every week.

Playing Drums in Music Class

We often visited the zoo on Thursday mornings before the crowds came. He loved watching the elephants and going in the reptile house. I often let him out of the stroller to roam around while looking at the snakes to help him practice walking. His absolute favorite animal was the lemur. He called them "dogs" and would just squeal and bounce and point to them. These zoo trips were one of my favorite things we did over the summer. We'd leave as early as possible and jam out to our Music Class playlist whilst navigating through the morning commute. I always grabbed Starbucks on the way and we'd arrive to the zoo just as they were opening. After a couple hours of visiting and checking out the petting zoo, we'd have a picnic by the lemurs and gorillas. Then we'd load up the car and drive home which usually resulted in a car ride nap time. Next summer, he'll be able to play on the playground and get in the splash pad. Oh boy! It's going to be wild out there with a 2-year-old. 😉

Watching the Elephants at the Zoo

Amidst all of the busy summer activities, I was able to find time for myself. Merbaby's in-home daycare affirmed Wednesday as "Mom's Day Out." I dropped him off for 6 hours, often running errands and completing chores during the free time. However, I also made sure to allow myself an hour or so of "me time" to go running or binge on Netflix. I also made Tuesday mornings my running day. We'd get to the park really early when it was still somewhat cool outside. He would ride in the strolledr with his music playing while I ran roughly 3 miles. Sometimes we took the dog, which he loved because he would just giggle at that little tiny furball running alongside the stroller.

Many days, I took naps when he did and he even started sleeping in (if you call 6:45 AM sleeping in). I felt so well-rested and completely content with life during that time. I really wish it could just continue on forever that way.

Morning Jog with My Babies!

Returning to work after the summer was much harder than it was going back after maternity leave. I cried a lot more and felt extremely depressed for quite a few days. I would give anything to be able to stay home with him everyday.

Merbaby's FIRST Birthday
It's unfathomable how quickly year one passed by. It seems like just yesterday I was bringing my tiny little newborn home.

We had a beach ball themed birthday party at the house. The in-laws flew in to stay with us and help with food and set-up. My niece, sister, and her boyfriend's family came into town. We had a great turnout and SUCH a fun time. I kid you not, Merbaby was reveling in the chaos around him. He loved having all the attention on him and his little personality just burst out of him full force that day. He seemed to be on some kind of social high for a week following that. Having all of his friends, family, and caregivers in one space was the just the bee's knees.

Everyone looks forward to the smash cake and Merbaby delivered! He wasn't sure what to think after about all that icing but after a few tastes, he dug right in. His first taste of cake and real, white sugar was a success! He received so many thoughtful gifts, toys, and beach supplies. It would be remiss of me not to say that it was one of the greatest days of his life. He practiced walking with his friends, played in the new ball pit from his grandparents, kicked and threw around all the beach balls, and chased after Grandpa all afternoon. A smile was plastered across his face and it wasn't going anywhere. It was truly an amazing day. Everything worked out perfectly and went according to plan. It was even better than what I had imagined in my head.

First Beach Vacation
A week after his big birthday celebration, we left for the beach. It was a 6 hour drive that we made in 8 hours due to the stops. He did really great in the car without much fussing at all. But 30 minutes before we arrived, he had a major blowout! It happened just as we were crossing the border so we pulled over at a rest stop to change him. The fanny fudge ended up getting on the carseat, all over me, and all over his legs and arms. It took everything in me not to cry. ha! We had to pull out the luggage and change clothes before cleaning up the car seat and sanitizing ourselves. I think it took me half a box of wipes just to clean it off his body.

We stayed in a 1-bedroom condo with the most gorgeous oceanfront view. Sharing a room with Merbaby wasn't too bad. We were afraid it would interfere with his sleep and/or ours but he only woke up once during the first night. Unfortunately, the sunrise was facing right into our room and the curtain were very lightly colored so we started each day pretty early. But it worked out because Mr. Merman and I took turns going for a run on the beach while it was still cool outside. The beach was practically empty that early in the morning so it was peaceful and calm.

The waves freaked him out a little. He got really nervous about being in the water with the waves crashing toward him so we mostly stayed in the sand. I think that boy could have sat in the sand with his toys for HOURS. He was definitely in his element on that beach with nothing but toys and sand for miles and miles. Of course, we visited the pool each day before going into to eat lunch and take naps. Other guests complimented his smile and enthusiasm for the water. They just thought he was the cutest and happiest baby they'd seen. And I totally agree.

One morning, we drove to a small island to visit an untouched beach. It's part of a national park where they do not disturb the beaches at all. We had to walk on the longest trail (without a stroller) to get to the shore but it was worth it. The calm of an untouched beach first thing in the morning was breathtaking. We weren't lucky enough to see much wildlife but the driftwood, downed trees, and crabs were a sight to see. I'd definitely like to go back in a few years and spend an entire day there.

Switching Daycares
Going into this next school year, I knew I wanted to switch daycares. I didn't talk about it a lot on here but there were several things that made me feel uneasy about the in-home daycare he was in. It seemed like a constant inner battle between my gut feeling that something wasn't right and my head trying to convince me that everything was okay. I knew Mr. Merman would flip out over the cost of a real daycare facility but I had to follow my gut instinct and figure out something better.

I toured a couple daycares and interviewed another at-home lady. After making a decision and figuring out finances, I sat Mr. Merman down and explained everything: all the red flags, all the anxiety I experienced over the in-home daycare, the benefits of a real daycare, etc. He was very accepting of my decision and we spent several evenings reworking our budget so that Merbaby could attend a new school. This was truly one of the best decisions we could have made.

My level of anxiety is basically down to nothing! Nada! Zilch! And it feels so good! I am 150% happier with this new childcare. I look forward to dropping him off each morning and don't feel like I'm racing against time to pick him up every afternoon. Coworkers have commented on how at ease I seem this year. Even Mr. Merman says I'm a totally different person and it seems as if I actually enjoy my job again. I didn't realize how much it was affecting me mentally & emotionally until I finally committed to switching daycares. Relief immediately washed over me and it felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

However, getting to that point wasn't easy. Having the conversation with his sitter was a lot harder than I expected. We talked on the phone for an hour which involved tears from her and second-guesses from me. I don't think she is a bad person nor do I think she had bad intentions. I will always have a fond place in my heart for the woman who cared for my newborn while I figured out the working mom life. But I just don't think she was a good fit for us and I definitely don't think she listened to and/or acknowledged my parenting preferences.

Anyways, he is now at an academy with structure, curriculum, and even a KINDNESS program! They have an app where they send live updates throughout the day. I know about every diaper change, snack/meal, nap time, and activity he participates in. They even send pictures and it makes this mommy so happy. He has blossomed ten-fold since starting there. He is extremely social and seems much happier coming home in the afternoons than he did last year. They work with numbers, counting, and have story time each day. They have a music program every Thursday and do some sort of age-appropriate craft and gross motor skill activity throughout the week. If he so much as trips, I get a phone call letting me know what happened. When he was out sick last week, the director contacted me each day to check on him. And, I must say, not having to prepare meals and snacks to send with him is another burden lifted off of me. I no longer spend my entire Sunday cooking and packing up meals for the week.

Do I wish I'd sent him to the academy sooner? I'm not sure about that. If we were ever lucky enough to have a free sex baby, I do think I'd send him/her to the academy right away. But there's still some comfort in knowing that a brand new baby is in a home environment where germs are sparse and calmness prevails... or so we hope...

What Next?
We've got a few things coming up. Merbaby goes back to the pediatrician tomorrow to follow-up on the ear infection. Hopefully the amoxicillin did its' job. Currently, Mr. Merman is sick with what we think may be food poisoning. After a week with a sick toddler, this is just terrible timing. It almost feels like I'm a single mom this week with Merman being put out, especially in the mornings when I'm trying to care for the dog, the baby, and myself while still getting out of the house, to daycare, then to work on time. And then doing it all alone for dinner and bedtime too just puts me in an exhausted funk. I finally convinced Mr. Merman to get to Urgent Care. We're nearing 72 hours and he hasn't had any relief. If anything, they can at least treat for dehydration while he continues to fight this bug. He's there now and I'm waiting to hear form him...

(I think I've earned at least a couple hours to myself this weekend... and maybe a glass of wine).

Monday is Labor Day, which means it's a 3-day weekend! We're going to try out a new park with some friends. It's next to an airport and I hear there is a pretend aviation tower they can play in. I also think we should get our butts to the pool because we haven't been since school started up.

Work is going so well this year. I am able to get so much done without being attached to a pump twice a day! It's a relief and greatly improves my level of productivity.

Fall is just around the corner and I can't wait for it to be cool enough to go on afternoon walks/runs. I'm also really looking forward to the holiday season this year. Merbaby is old enough to interact and somewhat realize what's happening with each holiday. We've decided to dress him up and Trick-or-Treat for Halloween. As for Thanksgiving, we hope to stay with the in-laws, which means getting on an airplane. It will be Merbaby's first flight! We have so many exciting things to look forward to and I can't wait!